tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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