hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
