I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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