just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
