Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
