Im at strip club and am horny
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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