so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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