At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Randomize
