Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
