so that wasnt chicken after all
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
