The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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