But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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