: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
