big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Randomize
