Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
