now i know why i became what i already was.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
