No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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