Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
