yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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