should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
