We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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