I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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