Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Who did Billy Mays play for?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
