My balls are so social today.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize