How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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