in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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