I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You ate ashes out of my bong
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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