Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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