I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
