His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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