who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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