there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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