a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
The struggles of a small town man whore
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
