so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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