honey bunches of taint.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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