Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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