You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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