why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
