I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize