am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
