You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
