so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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