I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
