She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
