so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
