OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
