It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
