Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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