its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
