At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize