bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
