Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he laminated a picture of his dick.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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