is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
